uhuh
another chapter closed - this time that of malay drama. a responsibility that eventually turned into a labour of love in more ways than one. i guess i feel terribly sad that we only had one night to show for all our efforts which spanned the weeks before, and i thought everyone did fantastically yesterday night, and try as i might i can't believe it was only 24 hours ago that i was feeling completely euphoric because everything had unfolded so beautifully (with some minor hiccups here and there). i felt really, really good. but it eventually dawned upon me that with that, everything was finally over. finally.
actually that feeling more or less haunted me the whole week because although production week was such a blur in my head since it passed so quickly, i understood fully that with each passing minute i was not only closer to production day and seeing my baby staged but i was also inching closer to the end of it all. and it came, and passed and here i am. waking up this morning was different because i didnt have the worries of dwidarma on my shoulders but my heavy heart made it impossible to get myself out of bed. i was too reluctant too wake up and carry furniture and remove the set completely from the PAC - didnt want to physically make it seem so final, that we really had reached the end, and nothings going to change the fact that its come and gone. it wouldve seemed as though we had never come to perform last night, as we leave the PAC the way we had found it - clean, spotless and without a trace of the life we had put on stage and the laughter that filled everyone's hearts. its so surreal how this happens after each and every production and you don't get a chance to fully realise it until it's too late.
im really really glad it went well yesterday. im really glad. and finally, as i got out of the cab this morning from a late supper, as i shut the door and the cab drove away with rudy inside, i realised that i had to trudge home in the end. all fame is fleeting, and theres nothing that ill forget about those few hours in time to come.
had some audition for some musical today. am having huge second thoughts about it because i really need to get down to focusing on my school work and studying, as much as i dont want to. im not even terribly good at it and hence i dont want to even start but ive got to, sadly. and once that evil maxine sends me my photos ill upload them. meanwhile im really tired. maybe later then.
i miss all of you already.
god spoke 1:11 PM
actually that feeling more or less haunted me the whole week because although production week was such a blur in my head since it passed so quickly, i understood fully that with each passing minute i was not only closer to production day and seeing my baby staged but i was also inching closer to the end of it all. and it came, and passed and here i am. waking up this morning was different because i didnt have the worries of dwidarma on my shoulders but my heavy heart made it impossible to get myself out of bed. i was too reluctant too wake up and carry furniture and remove the set completely from the PAC - didnt want to physically make it seem so final, that we really had reached the end, and nothings going to change the fact that its come and gone. it wouldve seemed as though we had never come to perform last night, as we leave the PAC the way we had found it - clean, spotless and without a trace of the life we had put on stage and the laughter that filled everyone's hearts. its so surreal how this happens after each and every production and you don't get a chance to fully realise it until it's too late.
im really really glad it went well yesterday. im really glad. and finally, as i got out of the cab this morning from a late supper, as i shut the door and the cab drove away with rudy inside, i realised that i had to trudge home in the end. all fame is fleeting, and theres nothing that ill forget about those few hours in time to come.
had some audition for some musical today. am having huge second thoughts about it because i really need to get down to focusing on my school work and studying, as much as i dont want to. im not even terribly good at it and hence i dont want to even start but ive got to, sadly. and once that evil maxine sends me my photos ill upload them. meanwhile im really tired. maybe later then.
i miss all of you already.
god spoke 1:11 PM
